Barriers of effective listening are;
- Evaluating and judging. Are you so busy criticizing what the other person is saying that you don?t hear them? There is nothing wrong with using discrimination, but it is more helpful to defer judgment until you fully understand what the other person is talking about.
- Interrupting; when you don?t allow the other person to complete a thought, you are not listening.Many people interrupt because they are impatient. If you find yourself losing the train of a conversation because the other is talking excessively, ask for a summary and then continue to listen.
-Jumping to conclusions- It is easy to mentally fill in the details of what another person is saying and then to assume you have understood them. People often take everything they hear personally, which is one of the main reasons for misunderstandings that lead to breakdowns in relationships. You can remedy that tendency by checking out your assumptions first.
- Selective listening- People tend to hear what they expect to hear, need to hear, or want to hear and block out the rest. For example, if you have been feeling a lack of confidence in yourself lately, you might hear everything that is said to you through a filter of “Pm no good.” Or you might tune out everything that is critical, unpleasant, or negative because it is too threatening to hear right now. Keep in mind that everybody uses some form of selective listening. Get to know your form of selectivity and observe your tendency to block listening with it.
- Advising- You may think that you have to answer every question asked and solve every problem. Not true. The other person may simply be thinking aloud, asking rhetorical questions, or just looking for a supportive presence. In fact, as you share your advice, you may actually be disregarding what the other person is saying. Let others specifically ask for help or advice. Otherwise, just listen and be there. One valuable way to encourage people to solve their own problems is to ask how they would advise a friend with a similar problem.
- Lack of attention- Do you let your mind wander frequently in conversations, giving in to other external noises and distractions or to your own daydreams or plans? Often it is helpful to be up front about it—admit your temporary lack of attention to the person speaking; explain that you are sleepy, anxious, or whatever. If boredom is the problem, though, remember that the more involved you become in the conversation, the less boring it may be. Ask questions. Ask for examples. Summarize what you hear the other person saying. If all else tails, tell the other person honestly that you need to leave or get back to what you were doing. Good listening need not be a matter of silent endurance. Good listening is an active process.
- Pride-Another type of listening barrier is our pride or ego. Most often, we let our pride or ego to take over the conversation. We think that we are already smart enough to even listen from other people. We think that we are better from other people that we have nothing more to learn from them. When we close ourselves and stop listening to other people, we are doomed because we stop learning. To eliminate this listening barrier, be more open-minded to listen and learn from other people. You may learn more things if you open yourself and listen. But be mindful of selective listening. Remember that you don?t have to agree with everything, but its helpful if you at least consider listening.
- Assumptions-Human mind is mysterious and it can process a lot of information, especially in , between conversation, even while the other party is still talking. This is why we have the tendency to interrupt, because we assume that we already know what the other is telling us. Such behavior is cause by another listening barrier called assumptions. Assumptions are statement that is assumed to be true and from which a conclusion can be drawn. Quiet often, when we make assumptions, we already create conclusion in our mind without even considering the thoughts and feelings of the other person. And as such, you create more gap and unresolved problems.
To resolve and eliminate this listening barrier practice keeping an open mind and listeb before you make any assumptions. You may try putting yourself in the shoe of another so you can fully understand and feel the sentiments of the other person.
- Close-Mindedness- this is intolerant of the beliefs and opinions of others; stubbornly un receptive to new ideas. When we think that we all have the answer, and that the things we know are always the right answers, then our mind will dose for new ideas.
-Defensiveness- It?s when we constantly protect ourselves from criticism, exposure of one?s shortcomings, or other real or perceived threats to the ego. Defensiveness is a primal response to feeling attacked, threatened, misunderstood or disrespected. This will normally results to never ending argument, protest, denial and blaming.
marto answered the question on February 5, 2019 at 08:07