How to handle long distance family relationships.

  

Date Posted: 10/1/2012 6:24:07 AM

Posted By: meg soni  Membership Level: Gold  Total Points: 2477

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A smart career move or serious romance has taken you away from your home town, you are enjoying yourself but every so often guilt strikes you because you feel neglectful of those family members you left behind.The challenge is maintaining a healthy loving relationship with relatives across the miles, learning how to deal with the guilt and pressure of long distance family relationships.

Consider the following: why you moved, if the family members were against the separation or did they support you and if you are staying in contact more for their benefit.After establishing this, you will be able to respond to your family and friends with sincerity.In your attempt to demonstrate love and concern, family can sense confusion, exaggeration, resentment or detachment, even across the seas.

It's important to guard against giving a false impression, even if your aim is to make them happy or give them peace of mind.Show them both sides of reality; that there are times when you miss them and times when you are getting on with your life and enjoying yourself.In this way, you don't have to perform in a way that you don't feel.

What to do:
- Use all modes of communication to keep in contact.
- Develop a communication rhythm, just like in a relationship where you are constantly together.
- Honor significant dates and events and go further by giving attention for no particular reason.
- Meet as often as you can. Don't say you miss them terribly and then spend a week's holiday with someone else.

What you should not do:
- Pretend you miss them.They might just send you a ticket or unexpectedly land on your doorstep.
- communication as the time apart increases.It might seem futile maintaining communication, but you could regret losing contact in later years.

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