Date Posted: 12/10/2012 11:16:18 AM
Posted By: Brendah Aroko Membership Level: Gold Total Points: 3317
The Bible says in proverbs that we should not spare the rod and spoil the child. This is a good teaching and it really urges parents to be careful not to lead their children to become rude and to loose their direction in life. The author of proverbs knew that the rod was the best method of disciplining children and I don't dispute that but I tend to feel that those people who make their children undergo physical torture in the name of disciplining them should not justify their actions by quoting the book of proverbs.Have you ever wondered about some of the effects of physical punishment on your child? Well, here are just but some few of them which are more evident in most cases of abuse by parents who claim to be correcting their children.Physical punishment involves inflicting pain on the child and it might lead to the child getting scars that may haunt them for the rest of their lives.Do you now that pain is one thing that children fear most and when they are subjected to it every time, they become demoralized and they might end up hating you forever. Everyone hates pain and at no time would we swish for it to become part of our lives, so why would we treat the children any less.We should do unto other what we would wish them to do to us.Being beaten tends to harden the child such that, his or her attitude becomes so bad that it kills. Some children don't really care who they talk to and what they say simply because they know nothing about pain, they are used to it and it wont really count if they are subjected to it. Take an example of juvenile delinquents, they don't change their character no matter the beating they are given in the borstal institutions.Parents should avoid turning their kids into rogues by beating them without cause and when it's not necessary.Beating leads to domestic violence. Such violence is not good and most of the time children who are beaten carry with them some extent of bitterness which drives them to think that violence is the only way out of any situation.This bitterness is not good at all and at times these people who undergo physical violence become the violent spouses in their families. So to avoid this, shun physical punishment.Beating causes rebellion and the children who are subjected to such a life become very rebellious and they cause chaos wherever they go, these are the kids who lead riots in schools, they try to object every effort by leaders to tame them and they end up dragging other good and respectful children as well into their mess.Physical abuse causes the victim to develop a low self esteem. They always struggle to convince themselves that they are worthy of love and affection and most of the time just despise themselves the more. These children live in constant fear of being punished and they fail to do what they want to because they don''t know if their parents or care givers will approve of it and so they become very unproductive.These children are also afraid of speaking their minds. They feel that their words may offend the person and they might fall into being punished again and this is not good for their self esteem.So alternatively, what do you think is the best way forward if we have to move from violence but at the same time discipline children? The best thing to do is to try and reason out with the child. Though they tend to be all hyper and violent try to tell them that violence does not earn them anything.When you feel that your child is doing something wrong, talk to them and hear their side of the story, ask why they did what they did and tell them what the impact of their actions were. Make sure that they truly understand the consequences of their actions before making them apologize for it.You can also try other methods such as giving the child some role to perform in the house when they do something offensive. You can make them do some cleaning for you or you can make them help the house help with some chores and run errands within the home. This is punishment but it does not inflict physical pain on the child, in fact it makes him or her know how to do some of the general chores in the home.You can also cut down on the child's allowances such as the money you give them when they go out. This will make them learn some manners and they'll do anything to try not to be cut off from their allowances.These are the most effective methods that have been prove and if you can try them out, you can stand the chance of avoiding raising hooligans while you think that you are disciplining them.
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