Effects of having heated conversations and anger

  

Date Posted: 4/2/2013 11:49:21 AM

Posted By: Brendah Aroko  Membership Level: Gold  Total Points: 3317

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What leads most people to hurt each other is anger, when there is a mixed reaction among a group of people and the two reactions are heated it ends up in chaos which we cannot control most of the times. I have learnt that anger does not solve anything but it on the contrary worsens the situation. In the society most of the times we are bound to be annoyed either by our siblings, parents, and children or even close friends and relatives and there is no guideline that explains how one is supposed to deal with such situations.

Wisdom dictates that we should never talk back when we feel wronged but that we take time to think things over before coming up with a response. A hasty tongue causes war as per the Bible so why is it so hard for people to practice this habit. At schools he teachers usually deal with the pupils and students according to their moods. They tend to end their anger from home or elsewhere with the students. This is totally wrong and very unprofessional because teachers tend to overlook the fact that they are also parents and that they wouldn't want their children to be harassed by their teachers as well. Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you so if you treat another person’s son or daughter unfairly then you shouldn't complain if someone else deals unfairly with your child.

As parents we don’t think twice before we smack our children, we are quick to anger and we fail to think about the child we are harassing. Most of the times we handle our children as though they have no feelings and we tend to punish them without telling them what exactly they are being punished for. When the

kids are jumping around the house they should not be beaten or punished because they need to play in order to grow and to develop psychological. They are children and they tend to be very active so if they are not given that chance to play then they end up dull and not really eager to learn.

Anger has led many relationships to end at such early stages. I have a very good friend of mine who got married two years ago and their marriage was a good one, they both had decent jobs and they never had problems. The lady was very close to her in laws and she always considered them in everything she did, she would visit them almost every weekend and they would go shopping with her mother in law and everyone envied their relationship. When the lady got a baby she decided to quit her job and be a stay at home mum and take care of their son. While at home, the mother in law expected so much from her and so she started avoiding her. The mother in law used to ask her to go to her house and assist her with her chores while she knew very well that she couldn’t make it. So the mother in law incited her son and told him that his wife was becoming very disobedient and rude to her, she blamed her son for spoiling her so much and she complained to him over so many things. The son got angry and when he went home he beat up his wife and the war was bloody and the screams from my friend drew people’s attention and they came to her aid. That same day the lady called her brothers who came and took her away and the marriage was over. If the son had taken time to investigate the issue he could have saved himself from the embarrassment that ensued from him going to confront his wife while angry.

In the recently concluded national elections so many friendships went into the drain because of anger. If you were friends and you were supporters of the rival candidates then you needed up exchanging words and most people are done being friends. I personally have had to block several people on social media because we hold different views. I did this because I didn't want to get angry every day when they update or make negative comments that would hurt my emotions. I believe this was the best I could do especially considering that I cannot gag people from talking their minds. It actually has saved me from having to get into heated confrontations over petty politics and I think for ones I thought of preventing a fire rather than extinguishing one.
I have heard many people claiming that they cannot be moved by anger but I have seen them acting out of anger. Anger is a sin; it is a vice that we should endeavor to defeat. When you are angry you lose your right judgment and you tend to be biased. It doesn't matter how much effort you put into mending relationships because as long as you fail to control your anger you will end up with more broken relationships. We need to avoid getting into any situations that will drive us to anger because it helps to avoid any arguments that are unnecessary.

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